Jobs

I have worked in various offices over the years. Each has both good and bad points. Sometimes if an opportunity comes my way, I get afraid to pass it up and jump ship. I have been at this job approximatley 2 1/2 years. It is by far, the worst run office I have ever seen. I am told that because of the current economy and job market I should be thankful. While admittedly there is truth to that advice, should I be really that thankful that I cry everytime I get in the car to leave and now take anti-anxiety medicine?

This place is a freaking joke. With the acception of one attorney, who I do not get to work for, these people have nothing to offer their clients. They don't care, they don't pay attention and God forbid they ever pick up the phone and talk to a client. Also, this office does about 45% workers' comp which has to be the bottom of the barrel regarding types of law to do. I HATE IT. Also, see first post re: lack of managerial effort too. My attorney sent me a message asking me to organize a file. What that really meant = I have dropped a file on the floor and don't want to pick up after myself. WTF? Really? My reply message = can i have your mother's phone number to ask if you were raised better?

This awesome attorney I used to work for had an opening b/c the girl there was going to be moving. Interviewed with all 3 attorneys, took 5 minutes to confirm I got the job. Was on Cloud god damn 9 Baby!!! This chica emails me about training and putting a packet together for me. Now I am super psyched. Just had to wait for her to get job in NC. I waited, waited, pre-celebrated, waited. And chica changes her mind. Head honcho is like dad to her so he was cool. Thank God I didn't jump the gun & turn in my notice. She changed her mind. So now I sit here in this cubicle hell. Feeling guilty because I am not at all thankful for this job and knowing there is nothing out there to get me out of here.

The Other Night

So my father almost died last week. His appendix burst but he didn't know it. He left for a reunion with his sister in Ohio. They take him to the hospital and he has gangrene, some other stuff and almost dies but doesn't. Yeah for choosing life Dad!

But I was really stressed out. Tuesday my pseudo Greek BFF (pseudo b/c she married one & did all the conversion crap), Millie & I decided we both needed a drink. Kids and others taken care of, we met up at a bar. We are both about to hit the the mid-30 mark and are kinda freaking out. She is married with kids and gets anxious for various related reasons. I have a child but have never, and most likely will never want to get married and I get anxious for various related reasons. Anyway, I think this aging thing is lurking in the back of our minds.

Millie invited our younger brothers' friend JP out with us. JP is cute in that funny awkward dorkey way and we just love him to death. Now I got there later but from what I understand Millie was trying to keep up drink-for-drink with JP. He was drinking beer and she was trying to chug huge glasses of wine. So they were pretty comfortable when I arrived. Everything was normal enough until we started chatting about how this group of little boys used to try and watch us change or hide on the roof when we were laying out when they were at our houses growing up. Normal enough conversation (I think...) Then things got strange but it was one of those times where everyone has had enough to drink that it doesn't seem strange (Until the next day in retrospect + hangover).

Somehow JP ended up holding my right breast. At some point Millie was in his lap trying to teach him to seduce a cougar, I had to kiss him b/c she had kissed him, complete and total nonsense. While all this is going on it seems funny. But it is lurking in my mind what is going on?

Neither of us really want to get with this kid. I think he was just allowing us to feel like the young, wanted and pretty girls we miss feeling like. No matter how many wrinkles, laugh lines, beginning-to-sag-a-tad boobs we have, all of us still have those girls still in us. It is nice to feel that way again and why can't more people let us feel that way? Except for the part where someone might have fallen in a ditch on the way to the car. Twice. In the same spot. Oh, and it wasn't me. So HA HA Millie everyone knows it is you now.

Don't get me wrong, I am not promoting hitting on your younger brother's friend or being married and hitting on anyone, but I will say the next day JP decided he wants to marry his current girlfriend b/c he knows she's the one. So maybe things happen for a reason. We got to feel pretty and JP got scared and decided to settle down. The lesson to be learned here - don't try to keep up drink-for-drink when your drinking wine and the other person is drinking beer.

Old Friends

Old friends are the best friends. There is something comforting when a bad thing happens about knowing they will understand why you act the way you do. You don't have to explain things because they already know stuff like - despite public appearances your mother is a psychotic hag and while your friend is nice to her, she backs you up on the evil factor; no matter how many times you say your family won't take advantage of your anymore, they will, and you will continue let it happen and friends just keep listenting; and no matter how much you pretend to be angry at people, they know you are just hurt and don't know what else to do; and most importantly sometimes a hug is all that can be done.

I got to spend last night with two of the bestest friends in the world. They did not bat an eye when I had to take a phone call from my family and then proceeded to smoke a pack of cigarettes and drink my body weight in wine (which by the way equates to vats). They just sat back and we picked up where we had left off in the conversation when I came back inside.

They made fun of me for accidentally being drunk and I love them for it. The older I get the more I realize that friends, lots of times, are better than family. You spend time together because you want to, not because DNA says you have to.

Nails

I love pedicures. Having someone soak, scrub and attack with a pumice stone just lets me relax. It used to bother me when the person would fist my calf muscles to loosen them up. Or so they said, mostly I think they sometimes have a competition to see who can get the most wiggle through out the day...
But I hate manicures. They never last. I have horrible finger nails that peel and then I bite them off. So Lil One and I decided to get manicures and fake nails put on last week. We went for a french manicure because I thought they would last longer and then we could always paint over it.
Good God ~ How do people stand these things? By the next night I had already cut them down to what I thought was an acceptable length. How the hell else would you be able to get your contacts out without leaving your iris intact? I'll admit that I like to tap the nails, they do come in useful if you have to pry something off too. But they get dirty and stuff gets trapped up in there and it is disgusting. I tried soaking them off with nail polish remover but they just got mushy. Finally I have gotten them off with the help of nail clippers and my teeth. There is somewhat of a nail bed left on my fingers. So I am worse off then before and $50 in the hole.Sometimes life feels so pointless.
Except, well, my feet still look god damn sexy.

Receptionist

I work in an office where the receptionist doesn't understand why she is supposed to be answering the phone. Sadly, this statement sums up how this office operates. She has now dubbed herself office administrator, even ordered herself cards. This would make me laugh if I wasn't trying so hard to stiffle the sobs while trapped in this cubicle hell.

She is so awesomely terrifying at her administration job if you ask her questions about the profit-sharing or you know ANY work-related issue, she stares at you in stunned silence. Admittedly I sometimes do ask questions repeatedly because I have learned to appreciate the brief moments of silence. It is a break from her walking down the hall announcing loudly that she "hates this fucking job" and "can't wait to get the fuck out of here" and my personal fave "this place is so fucking unprofessional". Yep, true story she behaves this way and there is no realization of the irony of the last statement being proclaimed loud enough for clients to hear her through closed doors. How does this happen? People like her blow my mind. But what really gets me is the people who employ her. For once, in a law office this stuff cannot even be blamed on someone banging the receptionist. There are hundreds of people who are being laid off from jobs and we have this brain trust. I just don't get it.